Judge not lest ye be judged yourself

If you dare to wear those fancy robes and whatever other bullshit garb that goes with being a judge, you better judge your own behaviour harder than anyone else’s otherwise shit like this happens: Massive douche tip: If you’re a judge, follow the fucking law.

Don’t murder children

Just because you’re not a good enough baby sitter to deal with a crying toddler doesn’t mean you get to punch the kid in the face until it’s dead. And just because you’re blonde and have blue eyes doesn’t mean you’ll get away with murder. What a fucking monster. 25 years is not long enough […]

Justice Porn

Ever heard of Justice Porn? Justice Porn is seeing just in action in a situation where it is extremely satisfying because of the actions or personality of the wrong-doer. This video has heaps of great examples. Massive douche tip: What goes around comes around.

Do not spit at people

Don’t spit at people. Definitely don’t spit at people and try to walk away like you think you’re some kind of boss. Absolutely don’t spit at people, try to walk away like you’re some kind of boss and then fall into a big pool of vomit, or you’ll really come across as a massive douche. […]

Admit when you’re wrong

If you’re in the middle of a disagreement and you realise that you’re wrong, just admit. ‘Winning’ an argument won’t get you anywhere if you’re wrong anyway, you’ll just come across as a jackass.

Don’t grab a person’s phone

http://youtu.be/QYYRUQyfhLk If you’re willing to risk your life for attention on the internet, you are a massive douche. While someone you’ve just ‘pranked’ slips into a blind rage and pummels your skull until it shatters, do you really want your last words to be “It was a prank.”? Massive douche tip: Do unto others as […]

Tit for tat during sexy time

Fellas, this one’s about sex and about how you’re probably way worse at it than you realise. Louis C.K. is going to teach you a few things here, try to take them on board. Louis starts off by talking about what it’s like to be a man. He mentions that we’re trapped in the prison […]

Treat your friends like friends

I love a good practical joke but there’s been a trend on youtube in recent times to act like a massive douche to complete strangers, make fun of the strangers’ normal and natural response to an absurd and often frightening situation, and then try to make money by posting the video of the incident. Like […]

It is not hammer time

I don’t speak Russian. Maybe I’m missing some valid explanation for a group of grown men attacking each other with hammers. My hunch however, is that there is no good reason, that this is just mindless, primate level violence. You decide… http://youtu.be/1ntR6Fm9iso These guys sound like a bunch of chimps with the way they’re screeching […]