It’s not easy to become a good man in the modern world. There are so many distractions, so much disinformation, so many trends to get caught up in. It’s easy to understand how any male in the modern era might find himself peaking out the douche-ometer and be completely unaware of it. We’re here to provide some guidance to those blokes interested in adjusting their behaviour away from what is commonly perceived as massively douchey by pointing out what not to do.

This site came about because I created a similar website for women, called How Not To Be A Crazy Bitch. It seemed too one sided to only be targeting the women of the world who are representing their gender poorly, so to work towards equality, How Not To Be A Massive Douche was born. I can totally understand that you might think the mere fact that I created a website called How Not To Be A Crazy Bitch automatically makes me a douche, and thus I have no right to offer advice about how to avoid such a label. Fair call, but I hope you have a look through both sites before you make that decision.

In the meantime, pull your pants up enough that your arse isn’t hanging out, learn to treat women as human beings, and stop pretending that you’re a millionaire, and maybe we might be able to make a bit of progress.