Take it up with the CEO

In case you weren’t aware, Chick-fil-A, a fast food chain in America, had been channeling donations to organisations which staunchly opposed same sex marriage. The CEO of Chick-fil-A, Dan T Cathy, publicly stated, and I’m paraphrasing here, that marriage should be between a man and a woman, because that’s what the bible says, and that […]

Martin Shkreli

If you haven’t heard of Martin Shkreli, you’re about to feel a bit worse about the world. I could ramble on about it, but I’ll let the videos do the explaining instead. Why people hate Martin Shkreli   To sum it up, Martin Shkreli is trying to convince us all that it’s totally fine to […]

Don’t be a bad winner

A quick and easy way to make sure everyone thinks you’re a massive douche is to be a bad winner. Being a bad sport shows everyone there that you care more about being first than you do about enjoying the competition, so don’t do that. If you win at something, you deserve to be happy […]

Judge not lest ye be judged yourself

If you dare to wear those fancy robes and whatever other bullshit garb that goes with being a judge, you better judge your own behaviour harder than anyone else’s otherwise shit like this happens: Massive douche tip: If you’re a judge, follow the fucking law.

Don’t murder children

Just because you’re not a good enough baby sitter to deal with a crying toddler doesn’t mean you get to punch the kid in the face until it’s dead. And just because you’re blonde and have blue eyes doesn’t mean you’ll get away with murder. What a fucking monster. 25 years is not long enough […]

Justice Porn

Ever heard of Justice Porn? Justice Porn is seeing just in action in a situation where it is extremely satisfying because of the actions or personality of the wrong-doer. This video has heaps of great examples. Massive douche tip: What goes around comes around.

Do not spit at people

Don’t spit at people. Definitely don’t spit at people and try to walk away like you think you’re some kind of boss. Absolutely don’t spit at people, try to walk away like you’re some kind of boss and then fall into a big pool of vomit, or you’ll really come across as a massive douche. […]

Welfare

It’s wonderful to have love for your children and it’s very important to let your kids know how much you love them, but for the love of Christ, please don’t get a tattoo of your child on your face. There are many reasons not to do this. One reason is that your kid is going […]

Do not terrify your girlfriend for your own amusement

This video has taken on a life of its own on the internet in the past few days. There’s good reason for it, too because this is an example of possibly the most douchey thing I’ve seen a human being do for quite a while. Check it out: http://youtu.be/kAPT72Mzt2c I was a young bloke once. […]