Starting a fight is almost always a douche manoeuvre. Don’t do it. Especially don’t do it when the fight isn’t going to be fair. If you enjoy being violent there are many different ways to vent that out in acceptable arenas such us by playing a full contact sport, or y’know, taking up boxing or mma or something like that where you are actually going to be fighting to a set of rules against other people who were also expecting to be fighting that day.

I tell you what, there’s nothing that makes you look more like a massive douche than starting a fight with no good reason and then getting your arse handed to you. There’s something glorious about the poetic justice of it all. The way the aggressor becomes the cowering mess, the way the bully becomes the wimp, the way the cocky dickhead becomes the apologetic cry-baby. I guess it’s the retribution of it because we’ve all been in that situation where suddenly we have to deal with a bloke who’s gotten himself worked up about something, or who’s trying to prove to himself that he’s important or whatever bullshit it is, we’ve all had to figure out how to handle something we didn’t start and it’s a frustration we can all live without.

Maybe that’s why videos like this make me so happy…

Massive douche tip: Keep your hands (or hand) off people